Category: Behold Vancouver

When you get rid of extra stress, lasting inner peace becomes attainable.

When someone asked me, “How are you doing?” a few years ago, I would usually say fine, and give my biggest, fakest smile. The real answer to that question was “stressed out of my mind,” but most of the time, the question “How are you?” is perfunctory and not an actual inquiry — and so we answer politely out of habit. But if you asked me that question today I would answer “fine,” and truly be fine (not insanely stressed).

That said, event though I’ve made progress, I still find myself filling any free moment I have with busyness. Even though I have fewer stressors in my life, I occasionally feel like I should be busier and start creating unnecessary stress to fill the void. 

If you struggle with stress, self-imposed or not, have I got a woman for you. She’s a 19th-century Carmelite named Sister Marie-Aimee of Jesus, and she wrote a little book called The Twelve Degrees of Silence.

Sister’s intent was to help people attain inner silence so that they could know God better. But I have found that if you look at her steps today, you can use them more superficially to help fight day-to-day busyness and stress. When you get rid of extra stress, acquiring a lasting inner peace becomes attainable.

Check out these 6 touch points from Sister Marie-Aimee, and see if you can find any ways to change your routine in response to them.

1. Silence of words

We’re inundated with communication every day. For example, texting. Are all of the texts you send necessary, or could you cut back on some texts and free up that mental space? Could you set a few times during the day that you send messages and then not text in between those times? That might allow you to have some clearer headspace.

2. Silence of movements/actions

Ever noticed a nervous tic you have? For a while I would shake my leg when I was thinking or bored. When someone pointed it out to me, I realized the constant motion was not actually helping me, and worked to change that habit. Try to find some movements or actions that you do in a day that are just fillers, and are actually making you less calm and more busy. 

3. Silence of imagination

Do you spend a lot of time during the day thinking about what the future will look like? That might be what you’re doing tomorrow, or what you’re doing when you get home tonight, or what you’re doing for lunch. Regardless of how far into the future you are looking, it is better to focus on the present moment if you want to foster inner peace. 

Work, family, plans with friends, sports … when do you take time to savor life?One of the problems that constantly comes up in many people’s lives is maintaining balance between work life, family life, and personal time. But in most cases the root of the matter is the inability to prioritize what is really important, especially caring for one’s own life. When something is really important for us, we find the time for it.

We tend to postpone the important things because of what’s urgent so our health and our relationships with others suffer. In fact, it’s the family that usually pays the high price of all the rushing we do. Don’t you think we need to stop from time to time? Could it be that we’ve forgotten the importance of taking breaks in everyday life? Have we forgotten the art of stopping?

We may be doing well in our work and achieving our goals, but on the way we can forget to take care of the life that sustains everything else.

How can we take better care of ourselves and not fall into unbridled busyness? The recommendation, from the ancient philosophers to the experts in occupational medicine, is to learn to take breaks in day-to-day life. It is an old and wise custom to pause in the middle of any activity, and it has great benefits.

Philo of Alexandria (1st century AD) understood rest as an activity without effort, as a creative state of calm. For the Jewish philosopher, only the irrational man is agitated, while the wise man knows how to rest to get in touch with his own creativity.

The art of stopping

The word pause in its Greek origin (anapausis) refers to “repose,” “interruption,” “rest.” In ancient times, the pause was understood as a creative act, as a healing interruption.

Specifically, it is interrupting what one is doing in order to do something totally different. While there are many exercises that can be done to rest psychologically and physically, a true pause must always include the opposite of what we are doing at work.

If we have been sitting in front of a computer, the pause cannot be a video game, but should involve physical activity. If we have been talking a lot, the pause should be silence. If we have been reading a lot, the pause is not to read something else, but to do something different.

The pause for those who work with great physical effort is stillness. For those who are working alone, their pause may require contact with others. And if it is the other way around and you work with many people, the pause will be a time of reparative solitude.

Scrupulosity is a psychological disorder primarily characterized by pathological guilt or obsession associated with moral or religious issues. If you’ve ever dealt with it—or know someone who has dealt with it—you know how confusing and difficult it can be. 

Today, Tanner helps you identify it, call it what it is, and turn to the Father’s merciful love for you.

You probably don’t outright lie on a regular basis. But, do you exaggerate? Do you give half truths sometimes, or leave things unclear on purpose? Do you hide some facts in order to smooth things over? 

Today, Fr. Mike shows us the very-human reasons we all struggle with these “white lies”, and how to tell the “full” truth more often. 

“Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.” —Jesus in Matthew 5:37

When should you turn to a priest, a mental health professional, or even an exorcist? 

Sr. Josephine Garrett offers practical guidance for navigating struggles, whether they’re mental, physical, spiritual, or emotional. She shares simple but powerful steps for strengthening your spiritual life, including monthly confession, joining a Bible study, and finding a spiritual director.

Drawing from The Bible in a Year, Fr. Mike offers powerful insights on what it looks like to struggle faithfully with God and grow in relationship with Him. He closes with a heartfelt Q&A, sharing personal reflections to inspire your own journey of trust and surrender.34:40 I’m a Protestant, but I feel like a Catholic after spending so much time with your videos and podcasts. How important is it to convert? 

39:08 If we can’t take a 30-day silent retreat, what can someone do to “really get to know God”? 

44:35 I’m tired of sinning the same sin. Tips? 

51:50 Fr. Mike: Collar or sweats, when you were recording the podcasts?

Few are familiar with J.R.R. Tolkien’s greatest love and what gave him profound strength during his darkest hours.

Catholic author J.R.R. Tolkien is well-known for his mythological realm of Middle Earth and highly influential Lord of the Rings series of books. In fact, one survey in 1997 voted Lord of the Rings the “book of the century.”

To find that, we must open up a letter he wrote to his son Michael. At the time Michael was 21 years old and having relationship problems. Tolkien wrote to him to share his advice about women, but also related to his son the greatest love he could ever possess.

Out of the darkness of my life, so much frustrated, I put before you the one great thing to love on earth: the Blessed Sacrament … There you will find romance, glory, honour, fidelity, and the true way of all your loves upon earth.

Cure for sagging faith

Many years later, when Michael was 43, Tolkien received a letter from his depressed son looking for consolation. It appears Michael wrote to his father about his “sagging faith” and began to doubt if God or the Catholic Church was true. This was Tolkien’s response.

The only cure for sagging of fainting faith is Communion. Though always Itself, perfect and complete and inviolate, the Blessed Sacrament does not operate completely and once for all in any of us. Like the act of Faith it must be continuous and grow by exercise. Frequency is of the highest effect. Seven times a week is more nourishing than seven times at intervals.

Tolkien was known to attend daily Mass at a nearby church and his eldest son, John, became a priest and was with his father at his death bed, likely giving him holy viaticum, the Holy Eucharist, as he passed from this life to the next.

Not surprisingly, within Tolkien’s Middle Earth there was a special type of bread called lembas, which sustained Frodo and Sam as they reached the place where their journey ended.

The lembas had a virtue without which they would long ago have lain down to die. It did     not satisfy desire, and at times Sam’s mind was filled with the memories of food, and the     longing for simple bread and meats. And yet, this way bread of the Elves had potency that increased as travelers relied upon it alone and did not mingle it with other foods. It fed the will, and it gave strength to endure, and to master sinew and limb beyond the measure of mortal kind.

The life we live is Jesus, the Way, the Truth, and the Life. The more we look to the Mother of that life, the more we come to know and embrace life in its fullness.

Tomorrow, on the solemnity of Mary, the Holy Mother of God, we will pray to God the Father: We rejoice to proclaim the Blessed ever-Virgin Mary Mother of your Son and Mother of the Church. Why do we start every New Year focused on the Motherhood of Mary?

We need the Blessed Virgin Mary to be our Mother, and for at least three key reasons.

1. The Mother of God’s love awakens us and enables us to be ourselves

The theologian Hans Urs von Balthasar reflected on a simple fact of life: “The little child awakens to self-consciousness through being addressed by the love of their mother.” In her book The Drama of the Gifted Child, the psychiatrist Alice Miller explains how

Every child has a legitimate need to be noticed, understood, taken seriously, and respected by their mother. In the first weeks and months of life they need to have the mother at their disposal, must be able to be mirrored by her …. The mother gazes at the baby in her arms, and baby gazes at their mother’s face and finds themself therein, provided that the mother is really looking at the unique, small, helpless being and not projecting her own expectations, fears, and plans for the child. In that case, the child would not find themself in his mother’s face but rather the mother’s own predicaments. This child would remain without a mirror, and for the rest of their life would be seeking this mirror in vain. 

And sadly, this is the plight of many people. But it is not the end of the story. For we have been given an Immaculate Mother who provides for our every need—Mary is the Mirror we seek.

Pope St. John Paul II expressed something similar:

A mother is not only the mother of the physical creature born of her womb but of the person she begets. Mary is Mother of God because she accompanied the Son of God in his human growth. Mary’s Motherhood is not merely a bond of affection—she contributes effectively to our spiritual birth and to the development of the life of grace within us.

O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,
It is the night of the dear Savior’s birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the soul felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
— Placide Cappeau de Roquemaure, “O, Holy Night”

Wanting to be a parent is perhaps the greatest human desire. The desire to love another soul unconditionally — to teach, guide and nurture — is profoundly exciting. Being willing to impact the life of another in such an intimate way is overwhelmingly selfless. The yearning to share one’s own DNA, body, family traditions, home and life with a new creation is a dream many experience years prior to attempting to create new life.

Yet, for those for whom conception does not come easy, their deep desire is met with even deeper pain. The pain of infertility is felt on various levels: emotional, physical, social, spiritual and psychological. It may feel like guilt, shame, anxiety or fear in the form of, “What did I do wrong?” or “Why me/us?” Some women wonder if something is wrong with their body since they are unable to carry a child. Some even wonder if their significant other will still want to be with them if they cannot carry new life in their womb. Attempting to conceive and the emotions that come with it can be more exhausting than exciting for the woman who desperately wants to be pregnant.

Suffering in silence

During the struggles of infertility some share their desire and despair only with their significant other, which may result in feelings of isolation in society. Some women feel like the nurses at their OB/GYN office know them better than their colleagues, as they are the ones who truly know what’s going on in their lives.

Sadly, infertility and miscarriage are not uncommon, yet the medical and grief processes surrounding such losses are something we do not openly discuss in our society. I would argue that more often than not, this is out of respect for the intimacy of trying to conceive. Additionally, we simply may not know what to say to someone who lost a baby when we only learn of the pregnancy in light of the loss. Regardless of reason or motives, too many women and couples suffer in silence or solitude and feel that there is no appropriate way for them to talk about their grief outside of their significant other, physician and counselor.

Now, at this point, you may be wondering why this article is included in a December publication. And that’s a fair question.

Relics can be confusing, so here is a brief rundown of what Catholics believe.

Why do Catholics keep saint’s bones, hair, clothes or even their blood in gold shiny boxes? Didn’t God condemn idolatry? While many (both Protestants and Catholics alike) are often confused by the practice of venerating relics, the tradition has deep biblical roots.

What are relics?

Relics are material items that are connected to a saint and are sorted into three “classes.” A first-class relic is all or part of the physical remains of a saint. This could be a piece of bone, a vial of blood, a lock of hair, or even a skull or incorrupt body.

A second-class relic is any item that the saint frequently used (clothing, for example). A third-class relic is any item that touches a first or second-class relic.

Catholics are known to preserve relics of saints and it is believed that graces from God flow through these objects to devout souls who venerate them.

Where in the bible are relics?

The use of physical objects related to a holy person goes back as far as the Old Testament. In it we see an episode from the Second Book of Kings that features the use of relics.

“And so Elisha died and was buried. At that time of year, bands of Moabites used to raid the land. Once some people were burying a man, when suddenly they saw such a raiding band. So they cast the man into the grave of Elisha, and everyone went off. But when the man came in contact with the bones of Elisha, he came back to life and got to his feet.” (2 Kings 13:20-21)

Even in the New Testament we see how God uses material objects to bring about healings. In the Gospel of Mark we see how a woman is healed because she touched Jesus’ cloak.

“She had heard about Jesus and came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak. She said, ‘If I but touch his clothes, I shall be cured.’ Immediately her flow of blood dried up. She felt in her body that she was healed of her affliction.” (Mark 5.27-29)

There are other examples in the lives of the apostles that clearly show how God works miracles through items connected to a saint.

Do relics have power?

While the Church encourages the practice of venerating relics, it is important to remember that it is not the actual object that imparts healing. A piece of bone can’t heal someone from terminal cancer. However, God can use a relic of a saint to heal, just like he used his cloak to heal the woman with the hemorrhage.